Where I Thought I'd Be

When I was growing up
I thought I'd be in New York City
I thought I'd be on Broadway
I thought I'd be famous

When I was in college
I thought I'd be back in my hometown
I thought I'd be a teacher
I thought I'd be there forever

When I moved to Florida
I thought we'd stay there a while
I thought we'd raise a family

When we moved to Texas
I thought maybe that was it
that Texas would be home
That we'd live in the Lone Star state

Since then I've stopped wondering
where I thought I'd be
I only think of where I am
And that I am happy

When January came I didn't think
of where I'd be come summer
I only thought of January
and the soft snow of Clifton Park

Now that I am here
In the "cold desert"
I don't think about the possibilities down the road
I only think about now and the heat
and the skyline of mountains surrounding me

There is peace here
and space
and freedom
and I won't think of where I thought I'd be
I will only think of happiness and serenity...for now.

Letters

Dear life--
Why must you be so difficult? Why must you provide me with sunshine once in a while and rain much of the time? Why do you leave me sleepless and wondering and making endless lists? Why do you move me from place to place? Why can't you be easy? Why can't you be painless and fun more often? I wait and I wait for a time when I can take a deep breath and relax for longer than six months. I try to remember that destiny is there--that everything happens for a reason--but it is so hard. Why do you make it all so hard? Why do I complain when people around the word are suffering? When others are dieing for freedom and happiness? I have no reason to complain about the tiny things that make my life somewhat difficult.

Dear you and Mr. You
You know who you are. Maybe you don't. I just want you to know I am content for the time being. I am happy now, and I am loved. I do miss you though. I miss the long conversations, the saki, the cemetery. I am glad I still have you to talk to. I know we are better off. Mr. You--I miss you. I know soon we will be together again, but I miss you still. I miss your sarcasm and your jokes and the protection I feel when I'm with you. I feel alone and small without you. Happy anniversary.

Dear Chipmunk--
I don't know why you have taken up residence beneath my fireplace. However, thank you for being quiet today. Part of me hopes you haven't fallen for the peanut butter on that mouse trap I left for you in the storage room. However, when I step outside, could you please not come out and stare at me as if I am trespassing on your territory?

The Tides are Changing

It is amazing the turns one's life can take in the blink of an eye. A few weeks ago I was sitting here thinking how nice it was not to be moving again...to feel secure here in the upstate. Now I am trying desperately to remember when the movers are coming, when I'm flying to Atlanta, when I'm flying to Texas, and when I'm moving to Colorado. That's right. Last week the hubby and I set out on a 30-hour adventure across the midwest, through the plains of Nebraska, to Grand Junction, Colorado. What's in Grand Junction you ask? Not much. A new and awesome job for the hubby...the Colorado National Monument, Grand Mesa, 15 wineries (in the desert no less)...but otherwise, not much. Fortunately, the trip was painless and we flew home satisfied that, if nothing else, we at least have a house to go to when we get back out there. Now comes the hard part. Now I have to live out of a suitcase for several weeks...first in Texas for a conference and a wedding, then in good ole state of Georgia where i will see my mom for the first time since Thanksgiving and work at a conference, then in Grand Junction where I will anxiously await the arrival of all my worldly possessions...ahhhh the good life. Since this is our sixth move in 2 years, most people don't even write our address in their address books...they just stick a post-it note in there with the most recent one!